Are you the type of person who will get a nearly perfect performance review, and focus for days on the one small comment that your boss made? Do you win races, and still analyze how you could have been faster or stronger, rather than enjoying your win? Do you find yourself questioning everything and offering to do a task again, even when you're told that your work was great? If so, you are likely struggling with anxiety and perfectionism.

There is a misconception in our culture that states that we have to strive for - and sometimes reach - perfection at all times to be valuable to our bosses, partners, friends, and family. We often think that "good enough" is lazy and that anything less than perfection is unacceptable. This type of thinking can cause increased anxiety, procrastination, failure, and feelings of worthlessness. But even when people know that, they still find themselves wanting to be perfect. They can't imagine how they can motivate themselves to do anything if they aren't striving to be everything.

When I tell clients that they don't have to be perfect to be good, they almost always tell me that they can't let go of perfectionism because without it they wouldn't have motivation at all. Their entire way of reaching goals is based on being the perfect spouse, employee, leader, etc. If this sounds like you, then I'd like you to try the following:

Strive for excellence. Not perfection.

Excellence is just that. It is excellent. In school, we knew that a 100% score was perfect, and that a 98% was excellent. A perfectionist would look at a 98% and question themselves for days, months, maybe even years. They would worry needlessly about the next exam and maybe even apologize for not doing better. Someone who strives for excellence would see 98% as meeting their goals, and would be free to focus on other things, because they hit their goal of excellence.

Perfection is usually impossible, and striving for it can come at a great cost. What good is a perfect presentation if it is completed a week after the deadline? How much time, effort, and resources do you put into perfecting something, only to have people barely notice? By focusing on excellence, rather than perfection, you will free yourself up to enjoy life, stop worrying about small things, and be able to enjoy your success for what it is. By focusing on perfection, you're guaranteeing that you'll never be content.

Strive for excellence. Strive for excellence in one area of your life or in all areas. Strive to inspire others to be excellent. And let yourself enjoy your excellence without worrying about perfection.

If you struggle with anxiety, letting go of past trauma, or feel like you can't relax and enjoy your life, I can help. Click on the contact button below to either email me a question or schedule your free 15-minute consultation.

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