Feel the fear and do it anyway - Eleanor Roosevelt

What is a badass? When you think of a badass, what do you picture? Is it someone physically imposing? Someone who stands in the power position and gets **it done? Is it someone who fights for human rights? Saves the world? Solves problems? Someone lives life fearlessly?

What makes someone a badass?

In truth, there's one thing that makes someone a badass and that's this:

A badass is someone who feels the fear and does it anyway.

Everyone feels fear. It's a primary emotion that evolved to keep humans safe. Fear is what keeps you from walking into traffic and assuming that the drivers will stop. Fear is what keeps you from jumping off of towers to see if you can fly. Fear is what keeps us alive and safe. Everyone has fear; without it, we wouldn't survive.

But fear is also something that holds many of us back. We fear what others think of us. We fear for the future. We fear trying new things. We fear failure. Sometimes our brains send out so many fear signals that we even fear when we don't feel fear - if nothing is wrong, then something must be really, really wrong.

So, what about the badass? What is the difference between us and the people who we see as fearless?

“Fearless” people feel the fear and do it anyway.

Can you become a badass?

Absolutely! Badassery isn't intrinsic. No one is a born badass. It's a skill that can be developed. We all have the ability to feel the fear and do it anyway.

Feeling the fear

Fear, anxiety, weakness, nervousness, wariness; they are all essentially warning signs from our brain telling us that danger is present. Sometimes the danger is overt, like when a truck is barreling at you. Sometimes the fear is covert, like when you feel like you don't want to do something but don't know why. Fear is uncomfortable. We try everything in our power to avoid feeling the tension it causes. But no one ever slayed a dragon by running away from it.

Next time you feel fear, sit with it. Notice where you feel it in your body. Notice how it changes and flows with your breath. For some people, it's tension in the shoulders. For others, it's churning in the stomach. Some people feel it throughout their body. Others have pinpoint spots of fear. Notice the unique ways that you experience fear.

The first time you do this, you may not notice much. Your brain will want to keep the status quo by ignoring those sensations. It's okay if you don't notice much, but stick with it for a few moments. You can't feel the fear without feeling the fear.

Once you have felt the fear, keep a mental note of how it feels for you. If it's a subtle tightness in the chest, or deep tension in the shoulders. Whenever you notice that feeling, acknowledge it. "I'm feeling fear."

Doing it anyway

This is the easy part. You've felt the fear. You've experienced the physical discomfort that your body uses as a signal of danger. Once you've felt the fear and sat with that emotion, it's time to do the thing. Make the presentation. Make the ask. Take the project on. Take the risk. The fear isn't going to go away until the threat of danger has passed. But if you face the fear and accept the discomfort, you can move forward in the direction of your dreams. Now you are the badass.

In anxiety therapy we don’t find ways to avoid what scares you. We find ways to overcome your fear. Anyone who has completed anxiety treatment is a badass. They have learned to manage their fears and move through their anxiety to get to where they want to be with confidence.

If you’re interested in anxiety treatment in Denver, Colorado contact me to schedule your free 15-minute consultation. You can ask questions, get a feel for what anxiety therapy is like, and decide if you think it’s right for you. Start today.